It's cray cray up in here!

The last few weeks have been absolutely ridiculous, but so full of grace!

We ran our own Shoe Box gift project for the school. At one point I had over 130 shoe boxes, 300 pencils, 200 pairs of socks and 200 bars of soap, and what seemed like a million different items in my classroom. It was madness! But in the midst of the chaos I was able to see how graceful kids are. They didn't mind having to sit other places because we didn't have space. They didn't complain that their teacher was getting cranky because it was taking over the classroom. Instead, they volunteered to stay after school to help organize, they wanted to write nice cards to the children who would be receiving the boxes. They were incredible and I was proud to be their teacher. I was so proud to hear other staff tell me how great and helpful my kids were. I was in awe to see the Grace of God shine through them simply by being kind and helpful. It was a good teacher week.

My little worker bees! 

Just the beginning!

Putting the boxes together! 

One of the cool things about being a K-12 school is the community we get to build with kids of all ages!

The Wrapping Station!

Another thing we celebrated was Thanksgiving! Although it is a North American Holiday it is still very much alive in our school. We had a feast with our 1st grade buddies to celebrate all the blessings we have, and of course make awesome crafts! 

Did I mention it happened to be super hero day at school? 

Who doesn't like to wear a turkey on your head!


These last few weeks have been exhausting for everyone here. We are running on low energy, but what keeps me going are these short people. They are dramatic and emotional and sometimes all over the place (similar to their teacher ;) ) but I love them! They continue to remind me what forgiveness and genuine love looks like and for that I am grateful. I may not know what is next in life, or why life can suck sometimes, but I know I am here to love and serve these kids and give them everything I have!

Happy Thanksgiving Y'all! Hug someone you love!

Take off the shoes!

It has been a long time friends and I am sorry... but not really I guess :)

I have had a lot of fun times this month,but nothing so riveting I will have you falling out of your chair in laughter. Yes, that is my expectation now!

Instead, this month has mostly been a true ride on my heart. I find myself so emotional I think I should buy stock in kleenex. Now, for those of you who know me well and maybe even those who don't, this is no surprise. I feel everything deeply. I used to not like that about myself, but this month the Lord has really shown me the beauty in it. He has created me to love and to cry. To laugh and to scream. He has shown his grace and love through my fragile heart, and I am starting to love that characteristic of him. Although it is hard for me to explain and be clear about what, and better yet why, I am feeling the way I am, I am learning to rest in the fact that I am not a hard person who bottles everything up. I long for the day when there is no more pain and our tears are bottled up. When there is so much joy because we are finally in the kingdom worshiping God, but for now I choose to focus on the beauty that comes with emotion.

As I was talking to a dear friend this week she asked me if I was grieving. Now, only ever hearing that word used for dead people I was a little confused. No one in my family or close to me has died recently (and I hope none die soon) so confused I asked her what she meant. As we talked and worked through a lot of crap I realized she was right. I am grieving, I am grieving for a life I think I should have. I am grieving for relationships that will never be the same. I am grieving the fears that control my everyday and also life altering decisions. I am grieving for this perfect person I have told myself I have to be. I am grieving because of doubts and that pesky selective hearing that only allows me to hear the extremely mean things people I love have told me this week. I am grieving that sometimes the people I think know me the best aren't really hearing what I am telling them. It sucks. It's hard. It is something we all go through, but that doesn't make it any easier.

I am recognizing and grieving this mold that has been created from comparison and lies. It is painful because I can not fit in it, but I keep trying. It's like the models that have to wear the tiny shoes because that is the expectation (yes, I watch way to much top model). If you want to make it as a model you have to wear the painful shoes because there is only one size. You have to starve yourself to meet other peoples expectations. You have to be someone you are not to reach your "dreams". And the best part is that you can't complain because you have not earned the status yet. They will kick you off the set. It is awful. And unfortunately it's like that in the church sometimes too. We put unrealistic expectations on each other, we are mean and cruel and we judge. We forget that we are enough. We forget we can walk without painful shoes. We forget that we need to love one another because we are all so desperate for it. We forget that sticks and stones may break our bones, but words can and do cut so much deeper into our souls.

Grieving is not bad, but something to celebrate! I may change my mind tomorrow but for now as I sit in my cozy bed feeling safe I am choosing to celebrate.

I am reminded of all of those cliché funeral sayings about life being a party and no one should wear black at my funeral, only remember the good things... ( you get the point). As tired as we get of hearing these things, I think they hold a lot of truth. We cannot spend our lives grieving, but we need to take time to heal and then start celebrating! The taking the time to heal is the hard part. The crucial part. Taking the time to really feel the pain people cause us. It is hard and I have been avoiding it for years thinking I should "be over" this by now but that is not the case. We all have different "shoes" that are hurting us. We don't want to take them off because we have trained ourselves to deal with the pain, to "rub some dirt in it" but we don't have too. There is someone who wants us to be comforted and loved, to take off those damn shoes that are slowing us down and making us cranky!

Take your shoes off and run with me friends! The road will still be rocky and painful but at least we can run!

Happy Sunday :)

Sara

The CAT bit me! and other events from the week.

Friends, I was bitten by a cat this week. Those who I talk to on a daily basis are done hearing about this, but it is not fair to keep such a life changing experience from those whom I love :)

Here we go! 

This week I went to the local tienda (which is just a small shop on the street) to buy some eggs. I have been to this tienda countless times and the last few times I have noticed a cat. Not a huge deal but you don't see a lot of cats around La Paz, humping dogs yes, but cats no. So on Tuesday I walked in, kindly asked the woman if I could have 12 eggs and then noticed the cat. The cat was being entertained by a man sitting in a chair with his cell phone that looked like it came right out of the 90's, large antenna, bigger then his face, probably had the snake game on it, the cat was not the only one entertained! 

Soon more people were coming in and out and I swear everyone who walked in the tienda, 4 or so people, mentioned how big the cat was or how cute he is or some other comment about the dang cat. Then the cat came up to me and started to rub up against my leg. Awesome. My first thought was great the damn cat is going to give me fleas or make my leg break out with something random. Then out of nowhere THE CAT BIT ME! I quickly moved away while the man in the chair laughed at me. The cat followed me so I grabbed the eggs, paid the lady and got out fast. I know dramatic but it was out of the blue and I have learned not to like animals in this country! No skin was broken and after a few days the only side affect I have experience is being more dramatic then is necessary. That my friends is my life changing animal experience. 

In other news we had our Spring Festival this week! Yes it is now spring on this side of the world and we welcomed it by having a fundraiser for our school. Those of you who know about last years experience about being run over by a giant ball, no worries it did not reoccur this year. Woo hoo! Instead I was pied in the face by students and put in the wet jail (which is being stuck in two soccer goals while being sprayed with a hose for a minute). Although it was not my idea Saturday it was such a blessing seeing students, hanging out with staff, eating delicious Bolivian food, and enjoying a nice spring day! Here are a few pictures of that fun filled day! 

After the children took their revenge! 

The new and improved inflatable for this year! No speeding down ridiculous size ramps! Just me looking like a fool rolling around :) 

Some FABULOUS women I get to call my friends! 

Ending our day at the sketchy hot dog man truck!



Here is to a great Monday!

Love, Sara

Don't eat the leaves of the plant please...

In the world of teaching (especially elementary) you often say things that you never thought you would.  This week I found myself asking kids some interesting things: "Please stop touching your friends." "Do you think putting the scissors in your mouth is a good choice?" "Why would you bury yourself in sand when I told you you had one minute left at recess?" But by far my favorite was "Did you just eat that leaf?"

As we were walking back from chapel I noticed two kids (who are not even mine) were acting really suspicious. As I went to help their teacher (who at the moment was locked out of her room, yes it does happen to other people besides myself) I noticed he put something in his mouth. When I bent over to see what was happening I saw that in his mouth was a leaf growing off the bush outside the classroom. As I asked him calmly "Did you just eat a leaf?" He proceeded to slowly stick his tongue out with the leaf on it where it then got stuck to his chin. The other boy erupted with laughter and they both admitted to sticking it in their mouth. Really. I thought to myself "Are you kidding me?" but there were bigger fish to fry so I told him to stop and then walked towards his teacher saying" Your friends are eating leaves". She looked at me with the same expression I am sure I had and then we banged on the door to try to get it open.

When I went into my own classroom some of my kids told me "Miss it is ok to eat leaves, it is just like salad". Trying not to roll my eyes I simply said you know what if you want to eat leaves you do it at home. Time for reading.

Telling children to not impale themselves with scissors, not touching people around them, and about not eating leaves. That is what my day job consists of. God bless you desk job people because I don't know what makes you laugh at your job.

Have a wonderful injury-free, leaf-eating day!

Sara

Oh! Here are some pics from my latest adventure to the hot springs that are hidden away in the beautiful (but scary as hell roads) mountains!

Finding Joy amongst the Crazy!

I could list all of the hectic things that seem to have taken over my life this week, but instead I have decided to focus on the not so crazy and more stable things. Tonight I took a bath (sorry if that is a bit too much information) but I had many wonderful thoughts while in that bath and I thought I would share them. I was sitting in hot water, listening to calming music and had a steaming glass of tea in my hand. Life was good. I was not being asked a million questions, I did not have little hands tapping me and wanting to know what time it was and when the next recess was. I did not have to take care of anyone young or old. I was alone. I was warm (which is really hard to get lately).I was a little bit uncomfortable at first, but soon I loved it.

As I was listening to the oh so calming music the lyrics that kept coming back to me where "your joy will be my strength" over and over I kept hearing it. "your joy will be my strength". Even after the song stopped and a new one came on "your joy will be my strength". Now sometimes I get really annoyed with the same words playing over and over because I mean where is the creativity it repeating yourself, but tonight it was calming. The peace that comes with knowing your joy will be my strength is overwhelming, terrifying, but also strangely exciting. Last year one of my consistent prayer requests was to find or be given joy. I think that my prayer request now is to find out what joy is, not necessarily find it or be given it but to know what it is. And to know what the Lords joy is. Not my earthly joy, but what it means to feel His joy and depend on it for strength. Friends if you have any thoughts or insight I would love to chat about it.

For now I will sit back and rest knowing that He has done and given everything we (I) need. I will continue to wonder what true joy is but I now have the peace of knowing that it is available for us.

Sweet Dreams,

Sara

Hi Ho, Hi Ho, It's Back to La Paz I go!!

Well it was wonderful summer full of family and friends but it was time for me to go back to work! I have only been back in La Paz for 5 days, but let me tell you it feels like it has been about 5 months!

It was much different coming back this time. I was excited and full of eagerness to get back in the country and the classroom! The flight(s) coming back here were hell and I cried in front of many strangers but the Lord heard my cry, was faithful and got me to where I needed to be. Although I still have many questions myself as to why I am here specifically (and why it is never easy getting back) I have chosen to trust that it will continue to be revealed over the next few months.

Progress! Part of it was revealed just this week!  As I started unpacking my room, planning the week, catching up with friends I was confronted with the real reason I love being here and teaching at Highlands. I have a purpose. Vacations are great and full of adventure and fun, but I love having a purpose. Right now in this country I have kids to love and help learn. I have old friends and now new friends to build relationships with. I have a lot of learning to do myself that has already started, and I am sure many more things to come!  It is a great feeling having a purpose, and an even better one loving what my purpose is! Although I know I will fail and run into problems I am hopeful for what this year brings. It is also exhausting, but no matter how tired I am at the end of the day I know I can go to sleep feeling as though I have served others and fulfilled what I am here to do. It is also very strange to say I love being tired, because who really does, but it is the kind of tired you feel after a really productive day, or a great workout (not that I do that a lot...ok ever).

If you are supporting me through prayer I ask for 3 continued prayers.
1. That I continue seeking my purpose.
2. That I will be able to grow without being resistant.
3. That even though I am tired I will still be listening to others and will be able to serve the best I can.

Well now that I have said the work purpose enough times to the point where it sounds like I am talking about a porpoise (man I miss the ocean already!)  I am going to take my strained eyes away from the computer and try to think about things other then spelling words and where the lunch boxes will go on wednesday!

Sweet Dreams Friends,

Sara

I'm too big for this country....

Over the last 9 months one thing has remained consistent in La Paz... the fact that I am too big for this country. Whenever I leave the apartment whether it is to go out to dinner, to the grocery store, or simply on a walk I am always running into things. Now this could mean I am just clumsy, but the fact is  I am always hitting things with the top of my head.  It could be an innocent tree planted conveniently in the middle of the sidewalk (who does that). A sign in the grocery store that is hanging just a bit to low for this five foot ten American girl, and sometimes even the celling feels a bit to close for comfort. Now I can't blame the Bolivians because most of their population just hits under 5'5 it seems, but it is always an adventure seeing what I might unexpectedly get into a fight with next.

Now just as you are starting to feel bad for me it gets better. Not only is my head to high up off the ground, it is also to big. My mother has always given me a hard time about how large my head was as a child, but I never felt it quite as much until I moved here. A friend of mine who is also a teacher and fellow large headed US citizen faces this problem too. We have been on a wild goose chase looking for a hat to guard out pale faces from the crazy sun, and I finally had to give in and find some over the Christmas break. Now we are able to sit in the sun at recess enjoying the warmth it gives without sacrificing the skin on our scalp, or are faces :) Finally a solution, until Bolivia day comes around. We have a day once a year that celebrates Bolivia and it's culture. The students and staff get to wear fun traditional costumes, perform dances, and eat! But this year the teachers get to wear a hat. And of course that hat does not fit our obscenely large heads (slight exaggeration)! Not to mention the costume lady came to take measurements and didn't even have to measure my body, she simply said large (with a slightly discusted tone in her voice). I tried the hat on yesterday with my class and they laughed and then proceeded to tell me that is how it is supposed to be. I am not so sure about that, considering it fits the other girls here. But I will accept it for one day.

Never-the-less the solution to my "unproportionalness"( I know, I know what kind of teacher are you?) is to embrace it. I will fight with inanimate objects, be the crazy gringa in the grocery store being attacked by the signs advertising the sales on juice and apples, and attempt to do a traditional dance without loosing my hat.

I have however learned that some things are not really taken into serious consideration when moving to a new country. Next time I will move to a land of tall-bred folks :)

I hope your day is filled with appreciation for the tall things around you!

Love,
Sara

Help...

This past month has been an adventure, no different then every other month I have lived in La Paz :) I have had my fair share of ups and downs, and their have been many tears shed. It has been a challenge to transition back into the culture and my job and not to mention through all this god has been ripping me apart and showing me a lot that I don't think I would necessarily be able to see if I were anywhere else. As frustrating as it is, the lesson I have learned this month is that it is okay to ask for help.

This is A LOT easier said then done, especially for myself. In my eyes sometimes asking for help, is admitting that I have failed. Asking for help means you have tried something and know you are not going to be able to do it alone. Once again not a bad thing it is just the way life is, we were not created to be alone but to live with one another. But this month it has been more clear then ever that I have to put my pride aside and ask others around me for their help and encouragement. Ironically I preach a different story everyday to my kids. I encourage them to ask their friends, myself, or even another teacher if they are struggling with school or anything else. I love to help those in need, and would never judge anyone for asking, but isn't that always the case. It is easier to look at others, before looking at your own issues.

I had a student come up to me while filling out a worksheet, she looked very discouraged and when I asked her what was wrong she asked me to promise her I wouldn't be mad. As many different scenes went through my head of what shenanigans could be happening I agreed and asked her to share with me what was going on. It turns out she didn't understand the math concept, which in a classroom of 97% English Language Learners is a frequent occurrence, but a somewhat easy fix. After I explained it once again I kept thinking why was she so afraid of asking for help? Did I come off as angry or threatening (which is the last thing I ever want my students to think) so I asked her. Her response was simple, because of an old teacher she had at another school she was afraid to ask for help. This teacher had damaged her view of asking for help, much like the world does to us today. She had been taught that if she doesn't get it then it is her own problem, sound familiar? Now 4th graders can be dramatic and I will be the first to tell you that, but I saw something deeper. I was able to see how her fear in asking me for help with math based on past experiences, was just the same as my own fear in asking for help with life.

So here is goes...I need your help.

I need you to be praying for me here, it is not an easy thing living overseas and it is very hard for me to admit it. I even came to a point this month where I would have rather left this year, not come back, and found something that was not as challenging. I became even more frustrated when I was trying to find the answer through others instead of looking in my own heart.  I know I do not want to leave because I still have a lot to do, I have a lot more kids to teach and a lot more to offer to this school. I need prayer to help me find the peace and excitement I had before the hard times took a hold of me. I also do not want to be a hypocrite and not live the life I tell my students and others to live. Hypocrisy is one of the many things I openly dislike about christians, but I will not get started on that one today :)

I also need your help financially (whew). I thought I was fine and dandy, but after many twists, turns and unexpected expenses it is getting harder and harder to be confident that I will be able to get back to the states and then back again. There are many ways if you would like to help. I will be sending out support letters soon, if you would like to get a letter please e-mail me at sara.wycinsky@gmail.com with your address.  If you would like to give a tax-deductibel gift online you can go to the link on this page to the right ---> or give at nics.org. If you would like to give in any other way you can e-mail me and we can set something up.

This is not something I take lightly, and I understand what it may look like. I am not asking to gain off of people, but to do the best I can while I am here. Asking for help is not easy and I am going back and forth everyday about it, but it is something I must do. We are not designed to live alone, work alone, feel like we are alone. We all need help, I need help and the more I say it, the better I feel about it! If you would like to help me or know of others who would like to invest in the crazy adventure I am on through prayer or financially please let me know.

Thank you for your support and I hope you are able to ask for help you need as well!

Love,

Sara

It's been a while...

Hello Friends,

I am sorry it has been so long, but it has been a wild and crazy few months! Between finishing up the first semester with Christmas programs, field trips, report cards, and packing, I was pooped.

I was really blessed to have the opportunity to go home for the holidays and rest. The funny thing about rest is that after the first two days I didn't consider resting as laying around and literally sleeping, but it was being active and creative, while not feeling pressured to do so. It was smashing a table with my sister and turning it into a wall hanging. It was walking around target and running errands many people dread. It was going through stuff in the garage with my mom, laughing at some of the creepy things that were found. It was being pressured to wear a Broncos jersey in order to be allowed in the basement at my friends house. It was such a wonderful thing to be at home. I was able to be around people who I could understand, cook with things that were available right away, go places when I wanted, and most importantly spend time with people I love deeply. I was able to see how different my two worlds are, and it was blessing to see the many ways the Lord has changed my heart since I have moved to La Paz. I had a deeper since of gratitude for things in the States, but also for the experience that taught me that gratitude.

The downside to going home was the hard time I didn't know I would have coming back. After a changed flight and arriving three days later then I was originally planning, I think I am finally back on a normal schedule. We have been back in school for three days ( I have to keep telling myself it's not Friday) and it is good to be back in an environment I know I am called to be. The confidence I find in myself while I am in the classroom is unlike anything I have ever experianced. Sure there are difficult days, and frustrations, but the love I have for the kids always wins. I have often struggled with not knowing where I belong, who I belong with, or what might be next, but the classroom is different. I know the classroom is where I am meant to be. My hope everyone is able to find a similar peace to the one I have found in teaching, because it is a wonderful gift!

I hope your week is blessed and you are able to take time to give thanks for the things we have!

Love,

Sara