We went Vegan!

Happy Monday friends!

 I hope you had a lovely day full of excitement! I don't know what you did, but I went Vegan tonight. Now this is not going to be a life change, sorry to disappoint those of you who are Vegan. But, in a desperate need for brownies, with no eggs in the house, we had to get creative and trust google. My roommate and I stumbled across a recipe for eggless brownies and went for it! We just happened to only have the things to make them Vegan. They are not like the trustworthy pillsbury brand, but when you need chocolate, you NEED chocolate! And this recipe did the trick!

I have also discovered that I love Mondays! I know I might be a little crazy, and possibly the only one in the world who likes them, but there is just something about Mondays that I love. It could be the wonderful feeling of standing at school welcoming in my 10 year old friends, who are just as excited about the new week as I am. It could also be the idea of the new week that lies ahead, the week that could go in any direction with many adventures to be had. It could have something to do with the fact that I am rested and rejuvenated from the weekend break. Whatever it may be, I have come to love Mondays.

This particular Monday was quite pleasant. Nothing extraordinary happened, in fact a lot of things were very strange today. I had to talk with my students about the possibility of not having school because of the strikes, most were disappointed which made me feel swell. The electricity went out at the end of the day, but in Bolivia you keep on teaching, even if it is a little darker then usual. Even though the lack of internet took my lesson in a new direction, and the kids were a little weirded out by the electricity going on and off, I was able to see so much joy in today.

As I was reading aloud, I asked my students to retell what had happened in the story last week. One student (who is never really paying attention) raised his hand and told me word for word what happened. I was stunned, and so were the other students. This little boy knew the answer, and better yet  he understood how to apply the strategy we had been working on for the last week. I later pulled him aside and asked him about it. I asked him what was different today, because at this point he had participated in every activity. His answer was "I don't know Miss".Grr. I then asked him if he was going to keep it up all week and he responded by saying" I will think about it". Really. I am praying that he keeps it up, but only time will tell. I know it is not a huge accomplishment, and tomorrow he many very well turn back into the same space cadet he has been all year, but on this Monday I felt as though I was accomplishing what I am here to do.

I learned today to let go a little bit more. I have been holding onto this idea that everything has to get done when I want it too. Today I was working with a small group and we were talking about making predictions. One thing led to another and we were soon pretending to read each-others minds. At one point they were standing above me pointing their fingers and pretending to pull the thoughts out of my head. Don't ask me how I got here, I couldn't tell you. In the moment though I thought, wow, these kids look like they have to poop when they make that face. I did not just think it, but I said it. Oops. About three seconds after the words escaped my mouth, there was an uproar of laughter. Pure, genuine giggling from their bellies, coming from my 4th graders because I made a joke about pooping. It was silly, and ridiculous, but I was reminded of how much fun I can have with my students and how much joy they have inside of them. It was a wonderful afternoon.

As I was reflecting on the day I was reminded about how restful this weekend was. On Sunday I was able to listen to a sermon on Galatians. We are studying this letter in our Bible study, but I always find enjoyment hearing others perspectives. I was reminded and convicted of something crucial about the Christian faith. In the first few verses Paul is addressing those who were changing the gospel. When I first read this passage last week I assumed it meant that they were changing facts, and turning it into a different religion. However, as I listened to the sermon, and re-read the passages, it was pointed out this was not what the Galatians were doing at all. They were not denying that Christ came, died, and was resurrected for us. They were denying the simpleness of the gospels truth. This is not something that just happened then, but something that is still a struggle in the church today. "Christians" try so hard to be these "perfect" people that we loose the point. I have been struggling so much with who I am supposed to be, especially in my role as a missionary, that I lost sight of my faith. The true raw faith that brings me to my knees searching for who God really is. We add so much to the Bible, when God specifically says not to. We make rules about how to speak, how to dress, what to eat or drink, who to be friends with, who to judge, and we transform into these people that we think are ideal. In reality this pushes more people away from the truth, doing exactly the opposite of the gospel's intention. I have not been able to understand a lot about my faith, but I am starting to realize that it is not the gospel that I am questioning, it is the people who are acting it out and putting rules that do not exist. I am certainly not an expert, and by no means except from this behavior, but I want to challenge you the way I was challenged. Do not look at the person next to you, but look to the truth. Are we acting as we should be, or are we just like the Galatians who are changing the gospel to satisfy are own needs? We are desired by God, that is the truth that should label us and those around us.

May your Monday be blessed,

Sara

If you send a girl to Boliva...

These past two weeks in school I have been teaching my kids how to write roundabout stories.I however,  had no idea I would be living one out this week.  In case you are unfamiliar with this type of story we are using If You Give a Mouse a Cookie as our mentor text. In class the kids had to think of their own character and then some ridiculous item to give them. During the lessons we discussed consequences that follow decisions we make and also rewards that can come with them. The kids were having a blast, wrote some very creative pieces and were so excited to show their parents at conferences this week! Me week however, was a tad different. This is a brief description of my week in roundabout form.

If you give a girl a birthday...

As many of you know it was my Birthday this week, and with this thank you for all of your kind thoughts and posts. I had a wonderful day at school! Birthdays are a bigger deal here and so the kids sang to me in 5 different languages, how many people get that in one day! A couple of my girls gave me some fantastically sparkly jewelry that I wore proudly, and some other students brought me chocolate candies and a cake to share with the class. It was a wonderful day that ended in extra recess and no one complaining, what else could a teacher ask for? However other things were stirring during the day without my knowledge. It turns out that there was conflict about some things happening in my personal life and by the end of the day I felt defeated. I was able to end the day with friends who treated me to dinner, and I thought the drama was behind me.

After the drama has settled of course it will be time for parent/teacher conferences...

I know what some of you are thinking, especially my fellow teachers, however I LOVED conferences.Yes, I said it. As my co-teachers stressed and worried I was excited when the next parent came though my door! I had my students do most of the talking, best idea ever! I also had met with my more challenging parents earlier in the quarter, so I knew what to anticipate. What I was not expecting was the amount of praise I would receive from the parents of my students. I had so many give me high remarks about what a great job I was doing, and also how much their student loved going to school. One Dad told me that at the last school they attended his daughter dreaded Mondays and never wanted to go, but now she complains about how long Sundays feel! I started tearing up. What more could I have asked for, I have so many days where I feel like I am not giving these kids enough and now their parents are sitting across from me telling me how grateful they are that I came to Highlands this year. Thursday and Friday were long days don't get me wrong, but they were exactly what I needed.

When the emotions are high she will want a break....

As much as I loved conferences and the encouragement that came, I still was feeling emotionally drained from the drama which was my birthday. One of the hardest things for me, here and even in the states, is when people are talking about me, and not to me. In this case it was out of concern and it was hard for me to focus in on this reasoning, however I was so emotional and upset that I was not sure what to do so I started to cry. I cried on the way to school Friday and when I thought I was able to get it together I started to cry at school. Some of my students saw me, but a good friend covered my class while I could get myself together. As I reflected on why I was crying, and as many of you know sometimes I just can't help it, I realized the the past 10 weeks I have been in La Paz have been so all over the place (wonderful and hard) and I had not taken the time to really recognize what I was feeling. I had built up so much frustration against my job, and the way some things were going I just needed to let it go. Luckily after talking with someone and getting back to class, I was able to end the day with praise as I mentioned before.I hope you are not freaked out or really concerned right now, because I am doing much better, but as promised I was going to share the good and the not so good days in Bolivia.

When she is feeling better she will go out to breakfast...

To continue the "awesome" birthday that had been happening all week, I went out to breakfast with my roommates. It was a wonderful morning followed by a haircut, where the man told me I was beautiful (you take it where you can get it).  It was one of the best days I had had all week and I was so grateful for the people I was with. We headed home and my goal was to try to get some work done, but lets be honest I would probably watch T.V and go on Facebook.

When she opens her computer....

I went to grab my computer and when I opened it I was less then enthusiastic. It had died. To be more specific the screen was out and all that was left were pretty colorful lines that filled my screen. I did not know what to do. I know nothing about computers and was just so mad at that point it wouldn't do any good to try. So I called my friend, he told me that the screen was gone and it would cost more to replace it then the computer is worth. So now what, although my week had highlights this was the icing on the cake! Now I have to spend money that I do not have on a new computer. I thought for a moment about going all hippie and not getting one, but the reality is that a computer is a necessity here. I use it for work, for fun, to communicate with people here and in the states and it has all of my lesson plans on it!!

So if you send a girl to Bolivia she might just loose her mind...

Right now I am in the state of acceptance, my friends are going back to the states and are able to bring a new one back but it is a matter of funds at this point. I know the Lord is a provider and he would not let me starve here in Bolivia, but this week I have seriously questioned a lot of things. I am grateful for where I am and for who I am with but my heart is a little bitter and I am trying to move on. I was reading in this fantastic book, that has pretty much been therapy the last few days. There were two parts that stuck out to me, the first was when she said " I choose to believe that sometimes that happiest ending isn't the one you keep longing for, but something you absolutely cannot see from where you are". The second part that I felt really hit me was about prayer. "That's the core of prayer: Admitting that just maybe, there's something going that we can't see. So when I am afraid, I pray, and I ask for God's help, that I will be able to see something I wasn't able to see before, or at least trust him to do the seeing." Shauna Niequist, Bittersweet.

I need your prayers, I need to see or at least trust that God is seeing the happy ending that is out there. There is a lot of unknown in our lives and things that are far worse then a broken computer, but this is where I am at right now. I need to feel that peace that I had when I chose to come here and the peace of trusting who God is in all his glory.

I pray that this week you are able to see the good things God has given you as well, and also try to thank him for the hard times. It is not easy, I will be the first to tell you, but he is sovereign and has not let me down yet.

With Love,

Sara

9 weeks in...9 weeks to go!

I'm not really sure how to start this post. The last month has been full of exploring new places, hardships with my job, ridiculous moments with my students and being run over by a giant plastic ball (yes, a plastic ball). 

Last month we had a three day weekend! It was such a blessing and a much needed break from school. I was able to travel down to Coroico with one of my roommates and two other teachers from school. It was much different from the place I live now, in fact I think it is where a lot of people think I live. It took us about two and a half hours by bus to get there but it was worth it. There are a lot of plants and "jungle like" trees, the streets are warm and filled with color and many tourists too. The weather was beautiful and I was able to where shorts!! It was wonderful! We stayed at a hotel that was hidden away on the outskirts of the city with only a few other people. It was not a 5 star hotel by any means, but it was a getaway and a new part of Bolivia I got to see. I did not bring any work with me and I was able to lay by the pool, drink yummy juice and read a book for fun! 

After the weekend was over we had to face the reality of work once again :( I love my job, but sometimes it is hard to come back after such a lovely weekend. The school had a lot to do that week, and so did I. We had the annual spring festival (yes spring :)) that helps raise money for the school and gives families a fun day. My job was to co-lead the intramural tournaments, and for those of you who know me well I am not by any means sporty. After that event was over, and with only a few glitches, I was sent to work the inflatable. This inflatable was like no other I had seen; it was a large blow up slide and the kids got inside a huge plastic ball and rolled down. Now I know you are thinking shouldn't there be professional people working it? Yes, and there were a few but they needed us too. Only in Bolivia. My first role was to collect tickets and I did that well, but then I got run over. Yes friends I was run over by the big plastic ball, pushed into a table and still have a bruise to prove it. It was not by any means my favorite part of the day and waking up and not able to move my neck all the way was no joy either, but the kids loved it and the school made money so I guess it was worth it. 

At our school the kids speak English, however they are all at very different levels, making conversations difficult but also extremely funny sometimes. This past week my student who has been living in Bolivia and Japan comes up to me and said "Miss, I first though outstanding meant you get to go stand outside". This was very funny because in my classroom I have a clip-chart for behavior. If they do well all day, which she usually does, they can move their clip up to "outstanding". She was not here the first day and did not get the whole story, so it was very funny when she thought her reward was to stand outside. Now to some that might be a reward I guess, but that was not the original intention. 

Another example of humorous things 4th graders say happened at recess this week. One of my co-teachers comes up to me and said "Sara your kids just asked if I wanted to play "One" with them?". We both looked at each other and soon realized they were referring to the game "Uno". One of the students had recently received this game as a gift and translated it so that we would know what he was talking about. After explaining that this is the name of the game and you do not have to say "One" I think he understood, but then again I never really know. 

In my classroom the kids and myself are working on staying organized, which is not my strongest strength at the moment. I was having my kids clean their desks before they left for the day and one student did not do his job. I called him over and told him that he needed to clean his desk, he said okay and proceeded to do so. He looked up after he was finished and asked "Miss, do I have to clean the inside too?" I told him no not today and with a sigh of relief he said "Oh good, because the inside of my desk looks like yours and it would take me forever". I just started laughing because although mine was not nearly as messy as his he had a point. I must say I love the honesty that these kids have. They are not afraid to tell you what is on their mind and I praise them for it! 

This job is not easy, not that anyone ever told me it would be, but somedays I think to myself I was not expecting some of the challenges I face. I was not expecting to have so much heartbreak in my class and not being able to do anything about it. I was not expecting to have some parents that are so hard on their kids they ask me if they can stay a little bit longer. I was not expecting to be as tired as I am some nights. This job is difficult, and their are even more challenges teaching ELL students in a grade with no other teachers. It is a love/hate relationship I have with teaching right now, but fortunately God is always reminding me more of the love. 

On that note I ask that you pray for patience and endurance for me. Pray that when the kids push so hard on the markers that I don't snap. Pray that I am the love they need, but I also can discern when they need more discipline. I have watched and learned from a lot of great people/teachers in my life, and I do not know how they do it so well! 

Sweet dreams, 

Sara